The best laid plans of mice and men

"Listen to the Mustn'ts, child,

Listen to the Don'ts

Listen to the Shouldn'ts

The Impossibles, the Won'ts

Listen to the Never Haves

Then listen close to me-

Anything can happen. child,

Anything can be."

~Shel Silverstein, "Listen to the Mustn'ts," Where the Sidewalk Ends.

My whole life has been one big Mustn't or Can't, Shouldn't or Won't.  Looking back, it is rather amusing to see all the things that I knew could or would never be; I can laugh now at all the futile tears and vain anxiety, but at the time it was truly heart-rending.  It is comforting to think that all my plans came to naught, but The Plans for my life have come to glorious fruition, sadly I was neither patient or faithful enough to wait in quiet anticipation for the years to bear fruit.  We are told in Proverbs that, 'a man plans his course, but the Lord directs his path.'  This has been proved time and again in my life, most especially this last year.  I look at the list of things I would never do or be and I wonder how I ended up Here!  Every so often, I remember thinking of the future and where I planned to be and when.  But I am glad my plans have been futile, His plans are better.  Mine might have brought me happiness, that fickle, ephemeral human ideal that is painfully birthed and often dies aborning or soon thereafter; His have brought me Joy, that virtue beyond all mortal pain and striving, that grows brighter and more dear amidst sorrow and suffering.  I suppose that is the choice before us, to choose happiness for its brief season, to, 'eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die,' or to run patiently the harder course, to tread the climbing way, to seek the narrow gate and trade these temporal sorrows for a morning that will never be dimmed.  I did not enjoy the pain, the tears, the waiting, but I would not trade it now for all those drab years filled with futile mirth.  At least in this grim world, all the good stories contain their share of sorrow; it is the really great ones that also have a joyous ending.  So listen to all the things you cannot or will not do, all the things the world says can never be, and then turn to Him who says the Impossible can be and seek out the path He has laid for you.  There will be sorrows, disappointments, and trials but that way lies Joy.